114: The Language of Lying

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Questions about the Video File:

  1. How many lies do people say a day on average?
  2. What devices are there to detect lie? To what extent can they be trusted?
  3. Why do we tell lies?
  4. What does linguistic text analysis point out?
  5. What are the telltale clues that help you identify a lie?

 

General Questions:

  1. How many lies do you tell a day? (Take your time to think it through and count all those you consider harmless)
  2. What physical changes do you notice in your body when you tell a lie? What are some of the common physical reactions of lying?
  3. Is it possible to tell if people are lying by analyzing their body language?
  4. How do you feel when you tell a lie? Excited? Guilty? Cool?
  5. Can you tell when someone is lying to you? How?
  6. To what extent do you trust people? Do you always consider the possibility that they are lying?
  7. Is there anyone you would never lie to? Why?
  8. Who do you lie to most? Why?
  9. Have you ever told a big lie? Could you hide it perfectly?
  10. How would you react if the person you were lying to finds out about it?
  11. How would you react if your best friend lied to you?

 

Related Quotes:

  • "If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything."  Mark Twain
  • "I'm not upset that you lied to me, I'm upset that from now on I can't believe you."  Friedrich Nietzsche
  • "I can take any truth; just don't lie to me." Barbra Streisand

 

Related Idioms and Expressions:

  • Lie through your teeth: to say something which you are totally aware that it’s not true.
    • He asked for my car keys and I lied through my teeth that I had just lost them.
  • be a pack of lies: to be totally untrue.
    • She said she was stuck in traffic and that was why she was late and everybody knew it was a pack of lies.
  • Live a lie: to pretend something which is not true, especially for a long time.
    • You have to tell her you are not a doctor and it was just a misunderstanding. You can’t live a lie long.

 

Related Words and Phrases:

  • Allegation (n) a statement that says someone has done something wrong or unlawful but there is no evidence for that yet
    • She heard all allegations about her son and smiled because she was sure they couldn’t verify any of them.
  • Unfounded (adj) characteristic of a piece of information that is not based on truth
    • My courtroom is no place for unfounded allegations.
  • Wrongdoing (n) an illegal action
    • All the wrongdoings were approved by her boss.
  • Torture (n) tremendous physical or mental distress caused in order to force someone to do something or give away information
    • During the cold war many spies were tortured to death to reveal intelligence.
  • Polygraph (n) lie detector: an equipment used to say if someone is telling lie or the truth
    • She was such a professional liar that even a polygraph couldn’t detect her lies.
  • Fool (v) to deceive or trick someone
    • She could even fool the police about her whereabouts at the night of the murder. They never found out she was not home that night.
  • Admissible (adj) acceptable by law
    • The evidence was announced admissible by the judge. They accepted his alibi.
  • Slip by (v) to get past without being noticed
    • She suppressed her feelings for him. She didn’t want to busy her mind with her feelings.
  • Conscious mind (n) part of your mine which you are aware of its activities as opposed to unconscious mind
    • When you are talking in a language rather than your mother tongue your conscious mind is actively choosing words and structures.
  • Cognitive (adj) related to the process of thinking and conscious mind
    • You need to focus on your cognitive functions to improve the quality of your decisions.
  • Qualitatively (adv) how good or bad something is.
    • The way you write your essays is qualitatively different from mine.
  • Subconscious (n) part of your mind where remembers thing while you are not trying to and you are unaware of that
    • She was frightened to talk to him as if her subconscious mind was protecting her.
  • Deceptive (adj) deceiving, making you believe something which is not true
    • Everyone believed her deceptive anecdotes. She is such a good liar.
  • Disassociate (v) to think of something as separate or not connected
    • She totally disassociated herself from her job when she was at home.
  • Pad out (phv) to add unnecessary detail to a writing or speech in order to hide the truth
    • She padded out the fact that he was not there by giving too many details about the party he claimed he spent tome there.
  • Hypothetical (adj) imagined but not necessarily true
    • He enjoys discussing hypothetical situations.
  • Apparent (adj) seems to be true.
    • His apparent innocence was just a trick. A closer test could say he was lying.
  • Convoluted (adj) very complex and twisted
    • Her convoluted excuses sound suspicious.

 

Related Collocations:

  • My phone died: my phone went out of charge
    • I wanted to call you but my phone died. I called you as soon as could recharge my phone.
  • Underlying assumption: a basic assumption
    • It was an underlying assumption that as a judge he wouldn’t take sides.
  • To paint a picture of oneself: to create an image of oneself in the minds of the others
    • She painted a great picture of himself in the mind of his colleagues and made them believe that he was an honest man.
  • Beyond one’s awareness: without being aware of something consciously
    • She knew she was not capable of lying but the reasons were beyond her awareness and she didn’t know why it was so.
  • Take work: needs lots of efforts
    • It takes work to master painting.

 

Please leave a response to the following question as a comment: 

Can you trust people when you find out someone has lied to you? Do you expect people you have lied to trust you?

There are 13 Comments

Actually, about the first part of question, it’s so hard for me to trust some people who lied to me in the past. Specially speaking, when they lie to me about important issues. I have convinced myself that parts of speeches I hear during the day are false and most probably lie. I always try to be far from liar people at my work place because they take and waste my time. Sometimes, I have shut myself in my room for hours to be away from some liars!!

Ok, and now about the second part “I’m not a liar”. It’s just kidding, because I try to control myself for avoiding of lies. Just white lies are enough for me. And about the correct answer for this part’s question, yes I expect people trust me after these white lies. Because, such lies are just for some situations or positions.

Totally, what in my mind about lies is that, lying is not so bad if it is applied in suitable situation.

My Q: What are the biggest lies in history?

That was nice Rahmat. Please take a look at these extracted phrases and sentences:

  • Specially speaking
  • most probably lie
  • far from liar people
  • Sometimes, I have shut myself
  • It’s just kidding,
  • for avoiding of lies.
  • I expect people trust me
  • what in my mind about lies
  • in suitable situation

Lying is one of the most complicated psychological issue that can occurs in many situations. First of all, we have to know the classification of lies and the psychological reasons behind that. For example, as soon as people feel that their self-esteem and their dignity is threatened, they immediately begin to lie to protect themselves. Actually they use lying like a protective shelter which hide behind and defend the social or personal  picture of themselves against anything could be challengeable for that.
As some psychologist believe many lies are simply for the purpose of maintaining social contacts by avoiding insults or discord. Small lies that avoid conflict are probably the most common sort of lies and avoiding conflict is a top motivator for deception. In addition you have to cosider that you're in a committed relationship with someone, you aren't entitled to knowing every details of someone's life. Whereas the person just protecting him or herself or their families from saying too much it's not that big a deal for me. But if the person lying to get away with bad behavior, like stealing, cheating or hurting someone, certainly this behavior has a severely negative effect on my life or the others’ life and it isn't forgiveable. I believe being close to a lier can have a bad influence on my mental health as well and I will try to keep a certain distance  from them. At last I will give them a chance to explain their lies but definitely I can not trust them again. I really believe in the quote which says “hurt me with the truth but never comfort me with a lie”

Hi Alireza. Nice one!

Here's more to think about:

  • one of the most complicated psychological issue
  •  that can occurs
  •  classification of lies and the psychological reasons behind that.
  • their self-esteem and their dignity is threatened
  • they use lying like a protective shelter which hide behind and defend the social or personal  picture of themselves against anything could be challengeable for that!! ;)
  • As some psychologist believe
  • you have to cosider that you're in a committed relationship with someone, you aren't entitled to knowing every details of someone's life.
  •  Whereas the person just protecting him or herself or their families from saying too much it's not that big a deal for me.
  • it isn't forgiveable
  • being close to a lier

  • * psychological issues
  • * can occur
  • * psychological reasons behind them
  • * are threatened( second 'their can be deleted')
  • * they use lies as a protective..can hide behind that....anything can be challenging for that
  • * some psychologists
  • consider.....entitled to know
  • * the person is just...that is not a big deal for me
  • * it is unforgivable
  • * liar

It’s amazing! Every day we tell lies and we don’t even recognise? I think it shows it is possible that there are many other things we do and we don’t recognise! Such a strange creature! I always think that I’m in control of myself and every thing I say or every thing I do is in line with my plan, I want to do them so I do them consciously.

On the other hand I think we are simple as well! Because there are some easy ways to recognise and analyse us! It’s scary I think. You start telling lies and you think you can deceive others but it’s wrong because it’s possible that your audience finds you’re lying.

Thank you Neda. Two points here:
 

  • every thing I say or every thing
  • it’s possible that your audience finds you’re lying

Also, the diction of your writing was casual. Please try to be more formal.

Thank you :)

-everything I say or everything...

-your audience finds out you lie?

  1. Said (pronunciation)
  2. positive (pronunciation)
  3. for example not necessarily deceive yourself
  4. complicated (pronunciation)
  5. lie teller = liar
  6. I tell lies very very low/little
  7. Wallet (pronunciation)
  8. I think it depends on the person that we want to speak with him
  9. I work with a lot of people who they are better …
  10. Frank (pronunciation)
  11. You will trust to them?
  12. Pessimistic (pronunciation)
  13. Doubt (pronunciation)
  14. I suggest that he goes out

6. I hardly tell lies.

7.ˈwɒlɪt

8. I think it depends on person we want to speak with.

9. I work with a lot of people who are better...

10. fraŋk

1-sed

2-ˈpäztiv

3-for example it is not necessary to deceive yourself or necessarily it is not good to deceive yourself or deceive yourself is not necessarily good

4-kämpləˌkātid

5-I didn't get your point